January usually promises clean slates, gentle resets, and responsible intentions.
Husets Biograf disagrees.
This year starts weird. Immediately. No easing in. No “nice first film of the year.” Instead, we open with a full-day sleaze marathon, dive headfirst into cult devotion, revisit gloriously ill-advised cinema on purpose, summon rituals, sing along, scream back at the screen, and remind ourselves why cinema is best experienced collectively and a little unhinged.
Skip the resolutions. The year has already started weird.
The January Bad Decisions Index
Not all bad decisions are mistakes. Some of them are traditions.
This month, we rate a few January screenings on their questionable judgment vs. long-term cultural payoff.
Use this as a guide. Or ignore it completely, that’s also on brand.
FRANK HENENLOTTER MARATHON
January 3 (Saturday)
Basket Case → Brain Damage → Basket Case 2 → Frankenhooker → Basket Case 3
Narrative coherence: ❌❌❌
Medical accuracy: absolutely not
Sleaze quotient: 🧪🧪🧪🧪🧪
Cultural value: somehow… very high
Regret level the next day: unclear
Regret level during: zero
Verdict: Starting the year with five Henenlotter films in a row is a terrible decision that becomes a personality trait.
THE NEW YORK RIPPER (1982)
January 8 (Thursday)
Serial killer voice choice: baffling
New York portrayal: hostile
Viewer comfort: not consulted
Giallo extremity: maximum
Taste level: controversial
Commitment to filth: admirable
Verdict: A bad decision for anyone seeking comfort, decency, or ducks. An excellent one for cult horror devotees.
JAWS 4 – THE REVENGE
January 16 (Friday)
Plot logic: ❌
Shark motivation: personal
Physics: optional
Sequel justification: nonexistent
Audience enjoyment: dangerously high
Verdict: Watching this is a bad decision. Watching it with others is community-building.
LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS (1986)
January 24 (Saturday)
Plant care skills: ❌
Business ethics: highly flexible
Faustian bargains: enthusiastically accepted
Body count (via houseplant): alarming
Musical numbers per moral collapse: optimal
Verdict: Proof that your worst New Year’s resolution is “I can fix this if I just feed it a little more.”
The plant cannot be fixed. The year starts weird.
Alternative New Year’s Resolutions
Forget gym memberships and color-coded planners. January at Husets Biograf suggests a different set of goals, inspired by films that immediately prove why “self-improvement” is a fragile concept.
Resolution: Question the Role You’re Playing
Inspired by: Kagemusha — January 7
Just because you’ve stepped into a role doesn’t mean it belongs to you forever. Sometimes the bravest thing is admitting you’re an impostor, and deciding what comes next.
Resolution: Lose Track of Time (On Purpose)
Inspired by: Pink Floyd Live at Pompeii — January 11
Not everything needs momentum. Sometimes standing still in an ancient ruin and letting sound stretch time is the point.
Resolution: Respect Invisible Labor
Inspired by: Take Out — January 13
Behind every late-night comfort habit is someone running on exhaustion and obligation. Pay attention. Tip well. Look closer.
Resolution: Fall in Love With the Thing, Not the Fantasy
Inspired by: Almost Famous — January 22
It’s easy to romanticize the scene, the tour bus, the mythology. Harder, and more rewarding, to love the music itself, the friendships, and the messy human moments in between. Idol worship fades. The right song stays.
January Diet Plan (No Gym Required)
This January, Husets Biograf recommends cutting back on:
• self-improvement guilt
• forced cheer
• perfectly reasonable taste
• the idea that “weird” is a flaw
Instead, we suggest a steady intake of collective experiences, dark rooms, and films that don’t rush to reassure you. Stories that surprise, unsettle, comfort, or simply refuse to behave are often lighter than the expectations we carry into a new year.
Side effects may include excessive laughter, emotional turbulence, spontaneous sing-alongs, and a renewed tolerance for uncertainty.
Results not guaranteed.
Enjoyment very likely.